Smelly Cat
Smelly Cat, Smelly cat what are they feeding you?
Smelly Cat, smelly cat it's not your fault...
They won't take you to the vet.
You're obviously not their favorite pet.
You may not be a bed of roses,
And you're no friend to those with noses.
Smelly cat, smelly cat what are they feeding you?
Smelly cat, smelly cat it's not your fault!
Blackout
New York City has no power
And the milk is getting sour
But to me that is not scary
Cause I stay away from dairy
La-la-la-la-la-la...
Episode: 110
I made a man with eyes of coal and a smile so bewitchin'
How was I supposed to know that my mom was dead in the kitchen
La, la, la, la, la, la, la...
Cremated Mother
And my mother's ashes
Even her eyelashes
Are resting in a little yellow jaaaaaaar.
My Coma Guy
You don't have to be awake to be my man
As long as you have brain waves
I'll be there to hold your hand.
Though we just met the other day
There's something I have go to say...
Babies
They're tiny and chubby and so sweet to touch
Soon they'll grow up and resent you so much.
Now they're yelling at you and you don't know why
And you cry and you cry and you cry
And you cry and you cry...
They Found Their Bodies
And they found their bodies the very next day
They found their bodies the very next...
In The Shower
I'm in the shower and I'm writing a song
Stop me if you've heard it
My skin is soapy and my hair is wet
And tegrin spelled backward is nirget.
Lather, rinse, repeat
Lather, rinse, repeat
Lather, rinse, repeat
As needed.
Terry's A Jerk
Terry's a jerk!
And he won't let me work!
And I hate Central Perk!
(time passes by)
And you're all invited to bite me!
When I Play
When I play, I play for me, I don't need your charity.
(Someone puts a coin in her guitar case)
Thank you! La la la la la la la....
Double-Jointed Boy
He was a double, double, double-jointed boy.
Stephanie
Stephanie knows all the chords!
Two of Them Kissed Last Night
There was a girl we'll call her ...Betty
And a guy let's call him ...Neil
Now I can't stress this point too strongly
This story isn't real.
(time passes by)
Now our Neil must decide
Who will be the girl that he casts aside?
Will Betty be the one who he loves truly
Or will it be the one who we'll call L-L-Lulie?
He must decide, he must decide
Even though I made him up he must decide.
Grandma
Now grandma's a person who everyone likes
She brought you a train and a bright shiny bike
But lately she hasn't been coming to dinner
And last time you saw her she looked so much thinner.
Now your mom and your dad said she moved to Peru,
But the truth is she died and someday you will too.
Don't
There'll be times when you get older
And you'll want to sleep with people
Just to make them like you
But DON'T
Cause that's another thing that you don't wanna do
That's another thing that you don't wanna do.
Farm Animals
Oh the cow in the meadow goes "moo"
Oh the cow in the meadow goes "moo"
Then the farmer hits him on the head and grinds him up
And that's how we get hamburgers.
Nowwwwwww, chickens!
Bi-Sexuals
Sometimes men love women
And sometimes men love men
Then there are bi-sexuals
Though some just say they're kidding themselves
La-la-la-la-la-la...
Crusty Old Man
...And the crusty old man said "I'll do what I can"
And the rest of the rats played maracas.
Love
Love is sweet as summer showers
Love is a wondrous work of art
But your love, your love, your love
Is like a giant penguin
Crapping on my heart
La la la la la la la...
Leslie Jingle
Home is never far away
Home is Home Star Stew.
Sticky Shoes
by Leslie
My favourite shoes so good to me
I wear them everyday
Down at the heel, holes in the toes
Don't care what people say
My feet's best friend, pals to the end
With them I'm one hot chicky
Though late one night
No much light
I stepped in something icky
(Chorus)
Sticky shoes, sticky shoes
Always make me smile
Sticky shoes, sticky shoes
Next time I'll avoid the pile.
Jingle Bitch
Jingle bitch screwed me over
Go to hell jingle whore
Go to hell, go to hell, go to h-h-hell.
Dumb Drunken Bitch
...dumb drunken bitch!!
The 66 Colours of my Bedroom
...fuschia and mauve
Those are the 66 colours of my bedroom.
Parading Goats
Parading goats are parading,
Parading down the street.
Parading goats are parading,
Leaving little treats.
Papier Maché
<three snaps>
I, I'm still waiting for my papier maché man.
Sticky Shoes
by Phoebe
My sticky shoe
My sticky, sticky shoe
Why you stick on me, ba-a-bay?